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Tips

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Signs your child is being bullied

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If you think you can’t make a difference, you are wrong.

If you think you are too old or too young to make change happen, you are wrong.

If you think that somebody else will do it first, you are wrong.

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TIPS FOR IN PERSON BULLYING

VICTIM

  1. The person being harmed or shamed.
  2. Walk away
  3. Tell someone you trust
  4. Take the initiative to get help
  5. Say something complimentary to the bully to distract
  6. Stay in groups to avoid confrontation
  7. Use humour to deflect the situation
  8. Never let the bully see you sweat
  9. Practice self affirmation (i.e. I am a nice person)

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BYSTANDER

The person who sees, hears or knows something but does nothing to help.  This could include receiving a harmful photo or video, seeing something at school or an attack online.

Instead of ignoring a bullying incident try the following:

  1. Tell a teacher (administration)
  2. Move toward or next to the victim
  3. Use your voice to say “stop”
  4. Befriend the victim
  5. Lead victim away from the situation
  6. Distract the bully

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BULLY

The person repetitively causing harm or shame upon someone else.Talk to a teacher/counsellor

  1. Put yourself in the place of your intended target
  2. Stop the cycle
  3. Think before you act
  4. Reflect on your own life to determine why you act this way

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TIPS FOR DEALING WITH CYBERBULLYING

If you are targeted by cyberbullies, it’s important not to respond to any messages or posts written about you, no matter how hurtful or untrue. Responding will only make the situation worse and provoking a reaction from you is exactly what the cyberbullies want, so don’t give them the satisfaction.

It’s also very important that you don’t seek revenge on a cyberbully by becoming a cyberbully yourself. Again, it will only make the problem worse and could result in serious legal consequences for you.

If you wouldn’t say it in person, don’t say it online.

Instead, respond to cyberbullying by: Saving the evidence of the cyberbullying, keep abusive text messages or a screenshot of a webpage, for example, and then report them to a trusted adult, such as a family member, teacher, or school counselor.

If you don’t report incidents, the cyberbully will often become more aggressive.

  • Reporting threats of harm and inappropriate sexual messages to the police. In many cases, the cyberbully’s actions can be prosecuted.
  • Be relentless. Cyberbullying is rarely limited to one or two incidents. It’s far more likely to be a sustained attack on you over a period of time. So, like the cyberbully, you may have to be relentless and keep reporting each and every bullying incident until it stops. There is no reason for you to ever put up with cyberbullying.
  • Prevent communication from the cyberbully, by blocking their email address, cell phone number, and deleting them from social media contacts. Report their activities to their internet service provider (ISP) or to any web sites they use to target you.

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If you are being cyberbullied, remember:

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  • Don’t blame yourself. It is not your fault. No matter what a cyberbully says or does, you should not be ashamed of who you are or what you feel. The cyberbully is the person with the problem, not you.
  • Try to view cyberbullying from a different perspective. The cyberbully is an unhappy, frustrated person who wants to have control over your feelings so that you feel as badly as they do. Don’t give them the satisfaction.
  • Don’t beat yourself up. Don’t make a cyberbullying incident worse by dwelling on it or reading the message over and over. Instead, delete any cyberbullying messages and focus on positive experiences. There are many wonderful things about you so be proud of who you are.

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  • Get help. Talk to a parent, teacher, counselor, or other trusted adult. Seeing a counselor does not mean there is something wrong with you.
  • Learn to deal with stress. Finding ways to relieve stress can make you more resilient so you won’t feel overwhelmed by cyberbullying. Exercise, meditation, positive self-talk, muscle relaxation, and breathing exercises are all good ways to manage the stress from cyberbullying.
  • Spend time doing things you enjoy. The more time you spend with activities that bring you pleasure—sports, hobbies, hanging out with friends who don’t participate in cyberbullying, for example—the less significance cyberbullying will have on your life.

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Tips for Parents and Teachers

No matter how much pain it causes, children are often reluctant to tell parents or teachers about cyberbullying because they fear that doing so may result in losing their computer or cell phone privileges. While parents should always monitor a child’s use of technology, it’s important not to threaten to withdraw access or otherwise punish a child who’s been the victim of cyberbullying.

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Spot the warning signs of cyberbullying:

Your child may be the victim of cyberbullying if he or she:

  • Becomes sad, angry, or distressed during or after using the Internet or cell phone.
  • Appears anxious when receiving a text, IM, or email.
  • Avoids discussions or is secretive about computer or cell phone activities.
  • Withdraws from family, friends, and activities they previously enjoyed.
  • Suffers an unexplained drop in grades.
  • Refuses to go to school or to specific classes, or avoids group activities.
  • Shows changes in mood, behavior, sleep, appetite, or shows signs of depression or anxiety.

Prevent cyberbullying before it starts

To stay safe with technology, teach your kids to:

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  • Refuse to pass along cyberbullying messages.
  • Tell their friends to stop cyberbullying.
  • Block communication with cyberbullies; delete messages without reading them
  • Never post or share their personal information online (including full name, address, telephone number, school name, parents’ names, credit card number, or Social Security number) or their friends’ personal information. (this is important that parents also not post details about their children online)
  • Never share their Internet passwords with anyone, except you.

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  • Talk to you about their life online.
  • Not put anything online that they wouldn’t want their classmates to see, even in email.
  • Not send messages when they’re angry or upset.
  • Always be as polite online as they are in person.
  • Google their name every few weeks to be aware of anything that has been posted.
  • Report anything negative that they see online about someone they know or care about.

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For more help and information on cyberbullying, please visit the following websites:

www.cybertip.ca
www.needhelpnow.ca
Get Cyber Safe

If you are the Bully…..STOP
If you are the Victim…..TELL
If you know someone being bullied…..HELP

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